Meditation or Art

The meditation today started with Ven Chai comparing meditation with art. And this art has defined my experience today.

Indeed: art, flow, passion - these are the most cherished experienced when our life just seems "right". When it is not a struggle anymore. I also remember that this is how childhood was - everything was perceived good most of the time.

And my meditation turned very arty: I was feeling rather tired, so my body welcomed my comfortable seated position, and drowsy warmth covered my skin. After the instruction to visualise a shiny sphere, I saw a tree.

Or, rather a crown of a tree - bright green, warm and leafy. I thought to myself that I've been looking at the trees a bit too much lately and tried to turn the tree into an orange sphere of light. It did not turn. Instead, my brain decided to take me on a ride to different beautiful places: we saw trees, flowers, sparkling pools, grassy paths. The images were interrupted now and then by me remembering that I am still looking for the sphere. In the end, I saw myself reading some scientific article, but once I realised that I am reading it, all the letters turned into Thai alphabet, and I could not read anymore. So I started to look for the sphere again.

I thought that usually it is easy for me to start visualising the sphere because it happens as I think of peace and happiness, which has its origin in the centre of my body, within this sphere of light. But today I was so happy and peaceful that I could not ask for any more happiness. I could imagine the sphere, but it was rather small and not particularly shiny, rather just a lovely orange circle. And then I thought that maybe that sphere is so difficult to see the sphere inside of my body because instead - my body is inside the sphere. I also remembered Ven Chai's recommendation to look into the inside of the sphere.  And indeed, once I changed my perspective, I realized that the contours of my body are no longer shaped as my body, but rather smooth and similar to an egg in shape. And the contour is a soft light - warm and orange, this light is what makes me feel so comfortable. And there's nothing inside me, nothing to disturb my peace.

I think I could have stayed there for forever. But then the class ended. 

Recently, my friend Ravi told me a story about a monk who has been meditating for 200 years. Ravi questioned, why the monk stayed meditating for so long. Now, I have the answer: nobody just told him that the session is over!